New Hal Xbox One Always Has an Eye on You

SEATTLE - USA - Just when you thought it was safe to get off your sofa for a few minutes, Microsoft comes out with a console that will ensure you never leave it.

“It’s got a big Hal eye on it that watches your every move and seeing as it was built by Microsoft, no doubt hackers will have a field day with this one. Imagine your every move in your living room tracked and watched by some Russian hacker in the Urals,” a cynical console user told Wired magazine.

The Kinect Xbox camera has to be connected to the console for it to work and monitor you at all times. Orwell couldn’t have come up with a better contraption, and as you peel back your girlfriend’s tight fit jumper to reveal the delights underneath, you can rest assured that there will probably be an audience watching the glorious proceedings.

“Let’s look at Microsoft’s record here. Well, it’s basically an open door policy for hackers and shady government agencies to have carte blanche with your data. With an Xbox One, you are not guaranteed privacy in your own home. But the games will be so good, you will not be able to resist buying one,” Charles Eddy, a privacy advocate told the Independent newspaper.

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