Sci/Tech

Prince Andrew Was Blasted Into Space Two Days Ago

BAIKONUR - Kazakhstan - Buckingham Palace has revealed that Prince Andrew was shot into space two days ago in a rocket, on a one way trip.

In a first for any #metoo victim, Prince Andrew, the former royal, was blasted into space two days ago, the palace revealed today in a press report.

“Prince Andrew, was put inside a rocket, and blasted out into space, two days ago. According to the flight team, he should be going past the moon about now, and will continue on forever. This is a one way trip,” royal spokesman, Giles Mandeforth, told the BBC.

According to the palace, the Prince was flown secretly to the Baikonur Cosmodrome in Kazakhstan, which is part of the Roscosmos State Corporation, on Monday.

“The prince was very jovial about the whole event and understood that he had done something wrong, and he had to therefore pay some sort of price. Prince Andrew was allowed to take some hampers on board carrying the luxury gourmet food he is accustomed to. He was also allowed to take a little plastic xmas tree with some blinking lights on it, so he can celebrate Christmas in the cold hard darkness of space,” Mandeforth added.

If calculations are correct, by August, the prince, if still alive, should be nearing Jupiter, on course to Alpha Centauri.

Another great win for #metoo, there were celebrations from hard-left feminists across the globe as another man had been banished from human existence.

Do you value freedom?

SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB We fight for freedom, justice, satire and coffee. DUE TO THE NATURE OF OUR JUVENALIAN SATIRE, AND CENSORSHIP WE CAN ONLY SURVIVE BY DONATIONS. PLEASE CONSIDER DONATING. THANK YOU. Biden Censorship | Starmer Censorship | Google Censorship
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by

Recent Posts

Far Leftists Celebrate as Their Enabled Terrorists Massacre More Jews

BONDI - Australia - The latest massacre killing 16 Jewish civilians by a terror call,…

10 hours ago

‘Open Borders’ Green Party Leader Wants More Diversity in Cottaging Industry

HACKNEY - England - The 'open borders' Green Party leader is fed up with the…

2 days ago

The Daily Squib Sold Out!

LONDON - England - The Daily Squib Anthology has sold out!

2 days ago

“Comrades! It’s Working! Heavy Taxation Contracted the Economy by 0.1%”

LONDON - England - Commissar Rachel Reeves has praised her heavy taxation policies, which have…

3 days ago

Prepare For War With Russia While EU Funds Russia by Buying Their Oil and Gas

BRUSSELS - Belgium - Mark Rutte, the NATO chief, said today that Europe must prepare…

3 days ago

Stop Crying Brexit Never Happened Anyway

LONDON - England - People are crying that Labour are cosying up to the EU…

4 days ago

This website uses cookies.