Madonna True Age Revealed

LONDON- England - A group of archaeologists and scientists have discovered the true age of Madonna using ground-breaking carbon dating techniques.

A group of eminent archaeologists have successfully carbon dated a portion of the celebrity Madonna. They were able to isolate the correct percentage of carbon 14 from a sample they had been given by an anonymous agent.

The amazing discovery has astounded the archaeologists who have declared Madonna a living fossil and treasure to science.

Speaking from The Institute of Field Archaeologists (IFA) Stephen Dawson said, “Today’s findings are truly remarkable, not since the discovery of artefacts last year in Leeds from the early Bronze age have we found such unique data. This surpasses everything that has passed before because the subject seems to be actually living.”

Exclusively only on The Squib, we can reveal here for the first time that Madonna has been found to be over 1200 years old and was born around 800 AD.

The carbon footprint has led the archaeologists to the then Principality of Benevento which is now called Italy and at the time was part of the ailing Roman Empire.

Conservation experts from the Institute will work on the fragile find and try to preserve the specimen for future generations.

The archaeologists, however, cannot tell us how Madonna has lived for so long and even though this is a total mystery maybe with more research and further tests they can ascertain the mechanics of this anomaly.

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