Internal Organ Removal Diet Could Be Next Big Thing

LOS ANGELES - USA - Dr Rubens Lisswowski for the Beverly Hills Organ Removal Diet Clinic (BHORDC) has revealed the latest diet to hit Hollywood celebrities and will soon go mainstream.

“Essentially we remove unnecessary organs from your body so that you will be thinner and lighter however much you eat. For example, take out a lung, maybe a kidney, half your liver and the majority of your intestines and you are guaranteed to lose weight and be lighter. In some patients we have seen drastic weight loss although they did not live long enough for us to conduct more tests on the efficacy of the weight loss system,” the doctor told the American Medical Journal.

The new diet was leaped on by overweight stars like Roseanne Barr, Oprah Winfrey and Rosie O’donnell who have sung its praises.

“I was taken to a medical facility in Beverly Hills where they removed my gallbladder, one kidney, one lung, and had my pancreas taken out. I went in in the morning and was out by 2pm it was incredible, they even showed me what they took out in a bucket on the floor of the operating table. Dang, I couldn’t believe all that stuff was in me no wonder I was so heavy, I’m sure glad it’s all out,” the now svelte talk show host Rosie O’donnell told CBS’s Morning Show.

The fashion industry has been using the doctor’s organ removal services secretly for years with models fed up of snorting cocaine all day long.

Even former glamour model Katie Price has asked Dr Lisswowski’s assistance to remove her brain but after extensive cranial scanning he could not locate it. She has since opted for her humungous basketball silicon breast implants to be reduced slightly.

Michelle Obama is also pushing her husband to include the Organ Removal Diet to be covered by Obamacare.

Tanya Turlington, a woman’s diet activist has spoken out against the organ removal diet and suggested a reliable diet resource that could instead help with losing excess weight without surgery.

“People need all of their internal organs, so please folks don’t get them taken out just so you can look like a size zero,” she told Woman’s Weekly magazine.

Next week an expose on the Beverly Hills Skeleton Removal Diet

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    50+ Investable Opportunities Found in a New Analysis Providing Economic Gains

    GENEVA - Switzerland - The World Economic Forum has identified over 50 investable opportunities offering…

    2 days ago

    Strait of Hormuz: Shame on Many Coward NATO Members

    LONDON - England - Multiple members of NATO have displayed their profound cowardice and shame…

    3 days ago

    Shia Islamic Iran Willing to Take Down Globe For the Twelfth Imam

    TEHRAN - Iran - The Shia Islamic Iranian Republic is awaiting the Twelfth Imam to…

    5 days ago

    Iranian Regime Now Releasing AI-Generated Disinformation of Captured US Soldiers

    LONDON - England - The U.S. Intelligence community needs to stamp down on the mass…

    1 week ago

    The Have-Nots Don’t Have Anything to Lose – But You Do!

    LOS ANGELES - USA - There are millions and millions of have-nots who don't have…

    1 week ago

    TRUMP: Kill One Ayatollah – Get Another One Free

    TEHRAN - Iran - President Trump sure got the deal of the century when he…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.