Charlie Sheen Taking Flying Lessons

“Charlie Sheen always wanted to fly, so we arranged some lessons in a Cessna. He’s already had 30 hours flight time and is ready for his first written test,” Mr Sheen’s agent, Bernie Goldstein, told the New York Times.

The actor’s long suffering flight instructor recalled some of the lessons: “First we go through the preliminary checks, then once we’re up in the air, Charlie gets the booze and drugs out. He snorts on the dashboard, then downs about six or seven bottles of red wine, and by that time we’re ready to land. Last week he brought up two whores for some in-flight entertainment. Sometimes, the altitude gets to him and he has one of his tantrums. After a few nosedives and loops the sound of the wheels screeching on the tarmac is a welcome relief. Good thing I always carry a parachute just in case though, eh.”

Mr Sheen has already gone through twelve instructors at the Torres Flight School in nearby New Jersey, as only a few are brave enough to fly with the actor.