U.S. Federal Reserve Minting Trillion Dollar Coins to End Deficit

WASHINGTON DC - USA - President Barack Obama has ordered the U.S. Fed to start the minting process of approximately eighteen coins; each will be worth a trillion dollars, the White House announced today.

“If the U.S. deficit is $17 trillion, then we will simply mint eighteen one trillion dollar coins. Once we have minted those coins, the U.S. deficit will be gone and we will have a trillion dollar surplus. Abracadabra, hocus pocus, and that will be that — we can then get back to spending more money we conjure up from thin air,” Timothy Franz Geithner, the U.S. Secretary of the Treasury told reporters at the Federal Reserve on Wednesday.

Some bankers are even suggesting minting one $25 trillion coin.

“It would only be as big as a penny but it would be worth a heck of a lot more. It would weigh approximately 43 grams and one thing’s for sure, you do not want to lose that thing behind the sofa or try to cash it,” another U.S. Treasury worker revealed.

Do you value freedom?

SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB We fight for freedom, justice, satire and coffee. DUE TO THE NATURE OF OUR JUVENALIAN SATIRE WE CAN ONLY SURVIVE BY DONATIONS. PLEASE CONSIDER DONATING. THANK YOU.
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by

Recent Posts

Comrade Starmer is No Friend of Meddling Capitalist Enemy the USA

GRIMSDALE - England - Comrade Starmer speaks about the enemy of the People's Republic of…

1 day ago

Trump Issues “Ultimate Bro-Mance Pardon” to Putin, Claims Ukraine Invasion Was Just “Borrowing Crimea for a Home Renovation”

MAR-A-LAGO - USA - President Donald Trump has issued a pardon to Vladimir Putin in…

2 days ago

New Analysis Predicts the Green Economy Will Exceed $7 Trillion Annually by 2030

GENEVA - Switzerland - A newly released report by the World Economic Forum reveals that…

3 days ago

“An OBR official who revealed the lies told by Reeves and Starmer has been liquidated”

LONDON - England - The head of the OBR has been liquidated and processed into…

3 days ago

A Day in the Life of a Woman in Labour’s Benefits Britain

ESSEX - England - Thanks to Labour's budget, taxpayers will foot the bill for more…

4 days ago

GameZone Casino Popularity Grows Across Online Communities

MANILA - Philippines - GameZone Casino is growing in popularity across many online communities as…

4 days ago

This website uses cookies.