Trump Already Installed a Cabinet in the White House For Nobel Peace Prize

The Gaza deal, it’s a done deal, just like The Don likes it. He’s also solved and brokered deals to hundreds of wars around the globe including World War II, and World War I and the 100 Years War, as well as the Battle of Agincourt in 1415. According to the Donald, if the Norwegians don’t give him the Nobel Peace Prize, there’s going to be some serious, serious trouble for them and Norway.

“Look at this cabinet. I got the gold stuff around it, see. I got the gold-plated things, you know, those designs. I got the glass here, it’s shiny, real shiny, they’re installing that tomorrow. Likewise, I just have to wait for the Nobel Peace Prize to put it right in here so I can add it to my multiple, multiple, quadrupletastic achievements,” the Teflon Don revealed on Thursday from the Oval Room.

Unfortunately for the Don, the socialist-leaning Nobel Peace Prize judges may have different views. As the committee deliberates in the green velvet and dark wood lined interior of the Nobel Committee meeting room, encircled by portraits of previous winners, there are signs Mr Trump’s demand for recognition is unlikely to be granted. Barack Obama was given a prize just for being the first black U.S. President, and he achieved nothing during his presidency, especially regarding bringing peace to the globe.

The fact is, Donald Trump does not align with the ideals of the Nobel Peace Prize and his divisive, swaggering leadership style will harm his hopes for the award, according to insiders.

The president’s military overtures, U.S. Aid cuts, mass deportations, and globally implemented tariffs conflict with the principles of international coexistence that the prize’s founder Alfred Nobel sought to inspire. The winner will be announced on Friday from a list of 338 nominees.

Mr Trump has deployed immense levels of intimidation on the Norwegian Nobel Committee, the five-member body that awards the prize, claiming to have “solved” numerous wars and declaring that it would be an insult to the US if he does not bring home the medal on December 10.

“If they don’t give me the prize I’m owed, well, lookee here. See that, those shelves in my new cabinet. The motherfuckin’ judges heads will be on those,” The Don said, smiling mischievously.

A word of warning to the Nobel Committee, remember when a certain guy was denied a place at art school? What happened after that? Do you think that decision worked out well?