World

George Floyd to be Sainted by Pope in America

LOS ANGELES - USA - WORLD EXCLUSIVE - Pope Francis will be canonizing George Floyd as a saint, when he visits America in July.

WORLD EXCLUSIVE

The violent criminal and drug addict, who robbed a terrified pregnant woman, beating her over the head with a pistol, George Floyd, will be sainted by the Pope in Minneapolis in July, the Vatican has revealed.

All across American Democrat run cities, white people have been told, they must from now on kneel whenever they see an African American, or any black person.

“Our police are kneeling now for black people, so every citizen will be asked to kneel whenever they encounter a black person of colour as well,” the Mayor of Los Angeles said whilst kneeling.

Knee Pads

Many white people in Los Angeles have purchased knee pads because of the amount of kneeling they have to do to black people wherever they go. Walking down a 200-metre stretch on the sidewalk for a white citizen can now take up to four hours because the amount of times they have to stop in front of a black person, get on their knee and apologise.

Pope Francis standing on popemobile and waving

Jeanette Colman, a self flagellating bleeding heart virtue signalling liberal from Malibu, revealed how the sainthood of George Floyd had affected her: “We now have a shrine for Saint George Floyd, we kneel in front of it and pray to him every day, even though we are atheist Marxists. I spend much of my time on my knees apologising to black people for my white privilege, just thinking of the horror our Saint George must have gone through when he violently beat the pregnant woman and robbed her of her last bit of money. Saint George could do no wrong, as he kicked her in the stomach before he left with the woman’s money. She was white and deserved it. Black lives matter, and Saint George Floyd, praise be to you, I drink champagne in your honour!”

Pope Francis will be coming to liberal American cities blighted by racial tension to administer the sainthood on Apostle George Floyd in late July.

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