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Britney Spears Mimes in the Shower as Well as Stage

LOS ANGELES - USA - Miming pop star, Britney Spears, mimes in the shower, as well as the stage, say her household staff.

Britney Spears to Release New Raw Singing Christmas Album

LAS VEGAS - USA - Celebrated songstress, Britney Spears is set to release a new album in time for Christmas that will showcase her raw talent as a singer.

Britney Spears Takes Out Restraining Order on Herself

LOS ANGELES - CA - Britney Spears, the ailing former pop mime artist, has taken out a restraining order on herself because she does not know what she is doing and has no control over herself any more.

Britney Escapes from UCLA Mental Institute

LOS ANGELES - CA - Britney Spears has escaped from the UCLA psychiatric ward where she had been forcibly incarcerated and committed.

Britney Spears to be Exorcised LIVE on MTV

LOS ANGELES - CA - The Vatican is today sending an emissary deep from within the catacombs of the Holy See to LA for a never before seen extravaganza which will be filmed LIVE on MTV.

Britney Spears Paparazzi Orgy Shock

LOS ANGELES - CA - Britney, who was recently linked to 'brummie' sleazebag pap photographer Adnan Ghalib, has had an orgy with up to 29 paparazzi at the same time in her LA mansion.

Britney Lost Virginity Late at 14

KENTWOOD - Louisiana - Britney Spears has been hit by allegations that she lost her virginity at the late age of 14. It is not customary for trailer trash in Louisiana to lose their virginity at such a late age.

Britney’s Photoshoppers go on Strike

LOS ANGELES - CA - The photoshop retouching artists who have been employed by pop star Britney Spears since the beginning of her career have gone on strike indefinitely, their union official said today.

Britney’s Yorkshire Terrier Rescued

LOS ANGELES - CA - Animal cruelty campaigners PETA are about to rescue Britney's Yorkshire Terrier dog Toto.

Britney Eats Big Mac During MTV Performance

Britney Spears made a spectacular return to showbusiness last night when she performed at the MTV awards by consuming a supersize Big Mac meal and a large tub of chocolate ice cream whilst simultaneously miming to her new smash hit song.

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