IOWA - United States - The entire Labour Government and Cabinet has been lost in the American state of Iowa. There are no plans to send for a search party as of yet.
VATICAN CITY - Italy - When he's not staring at worshippers with his hypnotic demonic gaze or sacrificing babies to Baal in the Vatican crypt, Pope Benedict likes to relax by perfecting his evil stare in front of an ornate gold-framed mirror.
WASHINGTON DC - The U.S. president's bizarre annual Christmas comedy video - starring Barney the White House dog shows the Bush's fun side.
WASHINGTON DC - A new craze has taken America by storm and is sweeping the extreme sports world off its feet.
LONDON - England - Recently back from visiting Bolshevik troops in Eurasia and Eastasia, who are fighting on two fronts to increase oil production for the plebiscite and proles. Our supreme unelected Commander in Chief Gordon Brown has warned traitors and treasonous state terrorists against protesting the huge hikes in petrol prices at home.
LONDON - England - Britain under Labour has plummeted educationally in the International Education League Table. Is Britain coming close to the education level of the USA?
LONDON - England - Comrade Brown, the unelected leader of the Labour one-party system in the Westminster duma, is throwing down the gauntlet to play the role of the bumbling fool and idiot Mr. Bean in a new feature film production funded by Northern Rock and other unnamed sources.
CHICAGO - IL - Looking for the ultimate high this Christmas? Don't worry folks, the Daily Squib has come to the rescue once again for an in depth guide on the best toy junkie highs this holiday season.
LONDON - England - The disks containing the valuable information of 25 million child-benefit recipients was found today in a London High Street.
KENTWOOD - Louisiana - Britney Spears has been hit by allegations that she lost her virginity at the late age of 14. It is not customary for trailer trash in Louisiana to lose their virginity at such a late age.