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Tuesday, October 17, 2017

TSA Speed Dating Now Big Hit at U.S. Airports

KENTUCKY - USA - This Thanksgiving, single Americans have been having a wonderful time at the nation's airports.
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Markets Do Not Want Trump

NEW YORK - USA - If you vote for Trump you vote for a future of serious financial upheaval, poverty, and destitution.

CCTV Cameras to Spy on CCTV Cameras

LONDON - England - Central Government in Whitehall has approved a scheme to increase CCTV on CCTV spying schemes.
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Travellers Going Through Calais Urged to Check News Before Leaving Africa

CALAIS - France - The travel chaos is so bad at the French port that many travelling from far flung places like Africa are being urged to check travel bulletins before making their journey.

Fall Guy Barack Obama Ushered Into Presidency

NEW HAMPSHIRE - USA - Barack Obama is being groomed to be the first black President of the United States of America. He is being instated to take the fall for George W Bush's disastrous tenure as President.

Why Saying Goodbye to NHS, Free Schools and Benefits Could be Easier Than You...

LONDON - England - There's no need to mourn the inevitable demise of Britain's much loved welfare system.

Phil Neville to Get Personality Implant Says BBC

SAO PAOLO - Brazil - The BBC's new football commentator, Phil Neville, is so boring and monotone that many people are either going to sleep or switching off the sound on their tellies news reports claim.

Squib Staff Take April Fools’ Day Off

LONDON - England - The Daily Squib will not be releasing anything off onto the internet today as the staff have been given their traditional April 1st day off.

Obama: "Why American Civilians Should Not Be Armed"

WASHINGTON DC - USA - The time has come for Americans to finally grow out of their obsession with firearms, and Obama's second term will ensure that he completes his mission to disarm America and make it into a 'safer' place.
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Big Brother is Watching: Surveillance Rectal Implant Box to Track Citizens...

LONDON - England - In the next episode of Labour's surveillance society, the government is backing EU proposals to have tracking boxes installed in every citizen's rectum.

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China Explosion Season Begins in Earnest

SHANDONG - China - Explosion season is upon us as Chinese cities explode. First we had Tianjin and now Shandong, but will it stop there, maybe not?

US Finally Reveals Plan for Iraq as Allies Retreat

WASHINGTON DC - On the eve of British forces finally backing away from American military tactics, a top US General has finally revealed a plan for Iraq.

Comrades Across World Welcome Centralized Economy

NEW YORK - USA - The final bell tolled today for capitalism as a new era was ushered in.

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