Secrets of Michael Douglas’ Youth Revealed

LOS ANGELES - CA - Michael Douglas, the Hollywood actor married to Welsh actress Catherine Zeta Jones of 'Darling Buds of May' fame, reveals the secrets to his youthful looks in next month's edition of Hello magazine.

Lord Goldsmith Calls for ‘Britishness’ Day and Oaths to the EU

LONDON - England - In a land full of rotten rhetoric, suffocating taxes, no right to vote on a referendum, and gangs of feral thugs roaming the dangerous streets there have been calls from the unelected Prime Minister Brown to embrace 'Britishness'.

Eco-Friendly Suicide Belts Being Used in Iraq

BAGHDAD - Iraq - Sheik Bin Abu Ayham is behind the introduction of the latest Eco-friendly suicide vest in use today in the warzone.

New Study Reveals Junk Food Good for You

ARKANSAS - USA - Forget about organic vegetables and fruit being the key to a healthy diet. Scientists have now come up with proof that eating junk food is better for you than so-called "healthy food."

Shock as Politician Linked to Prostitution

NEW YORK - USA - There was surprise amongst the population when a US Governor was implicated in a prostitution ring.

Chinese Olympic Swimming Event Under Fire

BEIJING - China - The Chinese Olympic swimming event is today under threat because of major problems wih the venue capacity.

US Marine Wins Annual Iraqi Puppy Toss Contest

SAMARRA - Iraq - A US Marine was today honoured for his puppy tossing skills in the yearly competition held in Samarra.

White Killer Whale Spotted

ANCHORAGE - Alaska - A white killer whale was recently spotted in Alaska's Aleutian Islands, sending researchers and their ship's crew scrambling for cameras.

Tesco to Open Tesco Store in Tesco Store

SCUNTHORPE - England - Tesco superstores have announced the opening of another Tesco branch inside an existing Tesco superstore in Northern England.

Obama Fights Back by Releasing Hillary Photo

VERMONT - USA - Barack Obama's campaign may have taken severe hits in Texas and Ohio, but now after being smeared by the Clintons with dubious photo releases he has shown - he too can play dirty.