MANCHESTER - England - Under Labour's regime, over 3 million migrants entered Britain, increasing threats of terrorism and crime.
LOS ANGELES - USA - Whichever Warner Bros executive thought it would be wise to spend $175 million on a Guy Ritchie King Arthur flick must be either mad as a box of frogs or as gullible as a Remoaner listening to Tony Blair talking about re-joining the EU.
MAJOR NEWS BREAKING
CHAMPERICO - Guatemala - A group of American refugee physicians numbering over three hundred had to be rescued from a makeshift boat yesterday after fleeing America.
TOLD YOU SO
WASHINGTON DC - USA - A year ago, Barack Hussein Obama was awarded a Nobel Peace prize, today he will be awarded a massive defeat at the midterm elections and be left as a 'lame duck' president.
LONDON - England - A brave veteran of the D-Day landings is to get media coverage and be given full honours from the prime minister reports claim.
THE HOLY SEE - Italy - The planet is at breaking point because of overpopulation and Pope Francis has revealed a final solution to the matter.
FLORIDA - USA - Anyone who reads social network comments knows what many blacks in America plan to do when George Zimmerman is acquitted, however there are other underlying reasons to black American discontent.
ATHENS - Greece - How long do you think 86 Billion euros is going to last if it is given to Greece? Two months, six months or even a year?
GLASGOW - Scotland - Football is in crisis. The old order has been overturned, revolution is in the air, and no-one is sure just how things are going to turn out.
NEWS ON THE HOUR
WASHINGTON DC - USA - The sixteenth president of the United States of America, Abraham Lincoln has been discovered to have had a black father according to historians and scientists working for the Institute of Historical Science which is linked to Harvard university.
WASHINGTON DC - USA - Scientists at the Institute of Historical Research have finally released their findings after five years of dedicated research.