White House EBT Card Does Not Work Any More

WASHINGTON D.C. – USA – President Obama is in serious trouble and may not be able to feed his family after the Electronic Benefits Transfer (EBT) system across the country failed yesterday.

The president and his family who depends on their EBT card had to contend with a furious wife when she went to her local K-Mart and was refused groceries for the White House kitchen on Saturday.

Michelle Obama told local news sources that she was not very happy about the situation.

“What ma gonna do? I gots me to go EBT shopping and the dumbass back home forgot to pay the gaddamn bills for the EBT processing center wherever the hell that may be? We got one corned beef can left. That good fo’ nothin’ idiot couldn’t organizize a cup of coffee in a coffee factory!”

Over 100 million Americans, including the White House, depend on their EBT cards every day to feed themselves.