Congratulations to Robert Mugabe For Getting 140% of Votes

HARARE – Zimbabwe – It was another landslide win for Mugabe’s Zanu-PF party today, with an incredible 140% of votes.

“We have a saying in my country, he who has the biggest armed mob wins. Oops I did it again. Until the next election eh,” a celebratory Mr Mugabe said from his plush palace situated 34 km from Harare.

Mr Mugabe, who has won every election since his rise to power has set an astounding record of votes gained in this latest election.

“It’s amazing, I knew the astounding results of the election before the votes were even cast,” an indepenent Zanu-PF electoral observer told state controlled news services.