Pope Benedict’s Message of Hope For New Year 2013

ROME – Italy – Pope Benedict XVI is preparing his New Year speech which will be held in St Peter’s square soon.

Pope Benedict will be expected in a few days to call on the faithful to contemplate on the New Year and how it will affect humanity.

His Supreme Holiness was wheeled out of the catacombs below the Vatican, where he is usually kept, to prepare the speech and ceremony bringing in 2013.

“I have been preparing my words carefully for the New Year celebrations. I would certainly not want to admit what I have really been doing in the catacombs deep below the Vatican, therefore I shall just talk about bits and bobs from one those chapters in the Holy Book?” the Holy Father said, sniggering wildly. 

The Supreme Pontiff also admitted that he sometimes feels the dark side of the Force raging through his body and he has uncontrollable bouts of bluish lightning jolting from his finger tips which can get somewhat bothersome during Catholic Mass.

Asked about the comparism between himself and Hitler, Pope Benedict said: “One was the leader of a fascist organisation which has tried to brainwash and indoctrinate the world with its far right ideology and the other is a Nazi.”

  • santa

    This gave me a good chuckle..

  • Johnetta

    I love the Daily Squib the British version of the Onion.

  • merina

    if pope can give brief answer to the world specialy to the non romen catholic who are in bible what is the real meaning of christmas and easter. and how roman catholic build up their religion.