Lawyers Only Ones Visiting Sharm el-Sheikh

SHARM EL-SHEIKH – Egypt – After a spate of vicious shark attacks at the popular holiday resort killing a German woman, and severely maiming many others, the only people who can wade into the shark infested waters now are lawyers.

“Everyone else has left. The tourists have all gone home, some even leaving in coffins,” Abdul Mahmoudi, a hotelier from Sharm el-Sheikh’s premier resort, the Bedouin, told the BBC.

It’s not all bad news for the hoteliers, however, because now lawyers from all over the world are flocking to the Red Sea resort to snap up some cheap holiday deals that no one wants.

“The sharks are actually afraid of lawyers, so even though the surrounding coast is jumping with shark activity, the lawyers go skinny dipping without so much as a scratch,” Barney Fudder, a tourist fleeing the resort told the BBC on Tuesday.

Marine scientist, Jacques Limbard, told CNN: “After observing the lawyers swimming in the shark infested waters, we were astounded to see that the maneating vicious marine creatures with razor sharp teeth, simply swam on by as if nothing were there. It’s as if they could smell them from miles away and knew that these lawyers were one of their own. In fact, I’ve rarely seen sharks act so placidly even when they were clearly starving.”