Bush Still Receiving Orders From Cheney

"Just keep looking straight ahead and pretend you understand what they're saying."

TEXAS – USA – Ex-president of the United States, George W Bush is still receiving orders from Dick Cheney, sources have disclosed.

“As soon as Dubya wakes up in the morning, he checks his phone messages to see what he’s got to do that day. Dick will tell Dubya that he needs to get the lawn mowed and go play golf with Rummy at 3pm. Then he might tell him that he needs to get a book for the new library he’s opening. He needs to choose a book with pages in it and writings,” Laura Bush told women’s magazine, Home and the Heart.

Mr Bush still can’t get his head around the issue that he has to think for himself, some old Pentagon cronies disclosed.

“Yesterday we met for a coffee at Starbucks. Well, Dubya had to call Cheney to ask him which coffee to drink. Then he asked Cheney’s permission whether he could go to the restroom to shake George Junior for a whizz. I don’t know if he has to phone Dick when he’s in bed with Laura, but I can see that kind of thing happening? He might need advice on what to do,” Herb Straznik, a retired CIA torturer from Bush’s reign told Fox News.