Hague: "I'm Not Gay But My Boyfriend Is"
LONDON - England - Conservative central office was in turmoil today after the Foreign Secretary, William Hague was forced to deny that he employed the services of a young man in a hotel room during the election campaign."It's all quite innocent. I was showing him the ropes about how Westminster works i.e. bend over and take it up the dirt hole. In my defence, I drank 14 pints of Best. Er, even though I'm a millionaire many times over I shared a room with my 25 year-old gay chauffeur, let's just say it's an austerity thing. Of course, because of the hotel room 'favours' I then gave him a high paying job as a special researcher," Mr Vague told a Commons committee hearing on Tuesday.
Speaking from Downing Street, PM David Cameron has stated that the entire Conservative party is right behind William Hague.
"No doubt, this will be another episode of the Tory wife standing by her man through thick and thin," a Westminster commentator told the Telegraph.
In Mr Vague's case, it's another case of an ex-public school boy hiding the sausage with a twink or two while the frigid Tory wife sits at home watching the news at Ten. No news there at all then.