Taylor Swift to Star In ‘Around the World in Eighty Days’ Remake

LOS ANGELES – USA – Demure pop starlet Taylor Swift has auditioned and won the leading role in a new Warner Bros production remake of ‘Around the World in Eighty Days’.

After sleeping with the whole production team, director and extras, she was told that she had secured the deal.

“We are pleased to announce that Taylor Swift will be playing the starring role after giving me the greatest night of my frickin’ life,” a member of the team revealed yesterday.

The film will be a loosely adapted version of the Jules Verne classic, except this time about a loose pop starlet who eventually catches a terrible venereal disease and carries it around the world like some unholy piece of luggage in eighty days.

Swift’s character, called Fillmyass Fogg, will travel the world in a balloon after accepting a wager that she can sleep with no less than 80,000 men in 80 days.

“This is a seminal semen filled film for any fan of Taylor Swift. You will see this wonderful strumpet strutting her wares to all and sundry as she trollops her way around the world in eighty days doling her now very loose oyster out to thousands of baying men,” the director Harold Cumalot, told Hollywood Now magazine.

The film will be released in eighty days. Work it out yourself.

  • mike wilks

    BAHAHAHA!!!!!! Loved it!!!!!!!! What a TRAMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Taylorloverxxx

    The person that writed this article needs to get their own life and stop trying to make ridup about an amazingly successful artist like Taylor Swift! The writer of this article is just jellous that Taylor Swift has managed to become an enormous success so they can sunk down to this low level to make themself feel better about them self!

    MAKES ME SICK!

  • Jay

    Love this can't wait for it to come out LOL

  • hannah

    thas not taylor in the pic cuz she dont ware shos like that. she only wares flat shos. get a liffe

  • Stacey

    Alphonse-Gustav-Adolphe de Poupon whoever u are u dont know whot ur talking about Taylor is not in any movie so stop with ur lies ok.

  • SWIFT FANZ

    HEYY!! LEVE TAYLOR ALONE WHYS IT OK FOR GUYS TO HAVE FUN SLEEPING AROUNF AND NOT GURLZ? DUBBLE STANDAURDS1!!! ?

    GETLOST HATERZ!!

    JANNI

  • Kendra

    Please refer to 'Mean' by Taylor Swift.