dailouk
Murdoch to Punish the English For Disobeying Him
NEW YORK - USA - Rupert Murdoch has vowed to punish the English for their rejection of his grip on the media and underhand techniques in acquiring information. ... Full story
Mission Impossible 6 Film Will Be About Tom Cruise Marriage
LOS ANGELES - USA - The next installation of the Mission Impossible franchise starring Tom Cruise will centre around the actor's marriage to actress Katie Holmes, studio execs have revealed. ... Full story
Obamacare: Half of South America Happy About Supreme Court Ruling
MEXICO CITY - Mexico - News crews from many South American countries filmed cheers of joy in the streets today as America's Supreme Court ruled in favour of Obama's health care law. ... Full story
Bank Caught Fiddling Interest Rates
LONDON - England - News has just come through that Barclays Bank has been fiddling interest rates for years. ... Full story
Gordon Brown 'Bath Salts' Rampage in Fife
FIFE - Scotland - Former Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, has been on a 'bath salts' drug induced rampage in Dunfermline's City Centre, reports from local media are saying. ... Full story
Jimmy Carr to Present New Reality Show 'Jersey Off-Shore'
ST HELIER - Jersey - Celebrity TV host, Jimmy Carr, is set to present and star in a new reality show that is set to become a huge hit with audiences across Britain. ... Full story
England Win Euro 2012
KIEV - Ukraine - England has won the Euro 2012 championship after a series of penalties clinched it for the beleaguered team. ... Full story
Penn State University Honoured By Pope
VATICAN CITY - Italy - The Catholic church head, Pope Benedict, has praised American Penn State University for its role in covering up child sex abuse. ... Full story
Eurozone Contagion: Germans Now Getting Lazy
DUSSELDORF - Germany - The German people are now becoming like their Southern European counterparts a new study has revealed. ... Full story
Home Surgery DIY Tips During NHS Doctors' Strike
LONDON - England - During the doctors' strike, you may need urgent surgery or treatment for certain ailments. The Daily Squib would like to give both of our two readers some important tips that could save their lives in an emergency. ... Full story
Youngsters Reenact Battle of the Somme
ISLE OF WIGHT - England - Can you imagine what it must have been like at the Battle of the Somme where thousands of young men perished in the mud and explosions during the Great War? Now a whole generation can understand a small part of one of the most famous battles in the First World War. ... Full story
You Can Take Those GCSEs Off Your CV Now
LONDON - England - Anyone who has a GCSE on their CV will have to remove the useless qualification from their resumes as of tomorrow, government minister, Michael Gove has announced. ... Full story
Good News For World's Stock Markets
LONDON - England - There has been some good news about the world economy. ... Full story
Jimmy Carr Attempts Asylum at Guatemala Embassy
LONDON - England - After being caught out as a celebrity who only pays 1% tax on his £4.7 million fortune, celebrity TV presenter, Jimmy Carr, has attempted to gain political asylum at the Guatemalan embassy. ... Full story
Christianity Experts: You Missed Him, Jesus Came Back Five Years Ago
MISSISSIPI - USA - Theological experts have finally revealed that Jesus Christ came back to earth five years ago but left soon after. Only a few people noticed his return and his departure. ... Full story
George P Bush Next In Line For Idiots Crown?
WASHINGTON DC - USA - You would have thought that the Americans would have had enough of the Bush clan, well you would be wrong, here comes another one. ... Full story
Another Greek Election Six Weeks Later
ATHENS - Greece - The world economy and EU is preparing for another Greek election in six weeks, then one after that, and one after that as well. ... Full story
Woman Has Bath With Bath Salts
KENTUCKY - USA - The local woman was said to have actually had a bath on Friday night and put the bath salts in her bath. ... Full story
Police to Advise People What to Say in Phone Calls, Emails, Texts and Social Networks
LONDON - England - New police powers to advise what people should say in phone calls, texts, e-mails and social networking messages could be implemented as early as next week, the head of Scotland Yard said in a press conference today. ... Full story
Greeks Will Refuse to Pay Back Money to EU
ATHENS - Greece - The spending splurge is over, and now that it is time to pay up, the Greeks refuse to clear their debts. ... Full story
It's Official: Obama Was Big Joke By Behind Scenes Hierarchy
WASHINGTON DC - USA - Pentagon insiders have finally conceded that President Barack Obama was all a big joke and the game is finally up. ... Full story
Lindsay Lohan Found Conscious
LOS ANGELES - USA - Lindsay Lohan was found responsive in a Los Angeles hotel room this morning, American news media reported. ... Full story
I Made It All Up: 'Treasury Boy' Revealed As Bullingdon Runaway
LONDON - England - A man who walked in to the Treasury building in May 2010 claiming to be a Tory Chancellor of the Exchequer has admitted that he made the whole thing up. ... Full story
Cameron Forgot EU Referendum Paper at Pub
CADSDEN - England - A mix-up after a family lunch meant the EU Referendum papers were left alone at the Plough Inn in Cadsden 'for about 15 minutes' ... Full story
Scientists 'Hacking' into Brain of Britney Spears
LOS ANGELES - USA - Spears, 30, has been working with scientists at Stanford University who are developing a brain scanner - a tool which picks up brain waves and communicates them via a computer. ... Full story
Madonna Nipple Falls into Man's Drink at Istanbul Bar
ISTANBUL - Turkey - An after concert party for pop starlet Madonna went terribly wrong on Sunday when one of her nipple's popped off into a man's cocktail at a local bar witnesses say. ... Full story
Cannibalism Could Be made Illegal In America
FLORIDA - USA - Legislators for the Supreme Court want to ban cannibalism in all US states it has been reported. ... Full story
London Olympic Athletes Threaten to Strike Over Pay
LONDON - England - British athletes on Saturday raised the threat of industrial action during the Olympics after voting to strike if they do not receive a £500 bonus for competing in the Olympics. ... Full story
British Summer Postponed Until July 2016
LONDON - England - It's grey, it's damp, you're soaking and it is very dark, just another British summer you say, but forecasters are saying the horrible weather could last until July 2016. ... Full story
Freedom Advocates: "If You Don't Like the Trolls Switch Off"
LONDON - England - One thing that was always inevitable about the internet ,is that sooner or later the politically correct interfering meddling legislators would try and get their dirty way with the beauty of free speech which is found on the wonderful world wide web. ... Full story
Queen Wants Jubilee Celebration Every Year
LONDON - England - Queen Elizabeth II has spoken of her desire to have a Jubilee celebrating her reign every year from now on, as she thoroughly enjoyed her sixtieth Diamond celebration so much. ... Full story
Fiddling Expenses: Warsi Problem With That?
LONDON - England - Another MP caught fiddling the expenses and their head firmly in the trough, this time an ethnic minority token who's got herself into trouble. Are there any surprises at the latest expense scandal to hit parliament? ... Full story
British Spirit of Adversity Shines Through on Gloomy Jubilee Weather
LONDON - England - One thing the Brits have always done well is a good stiff upper lip, and with British weather as it is, that is a good thing to have in your arsenal. ... Full story
Britons Getting Ready For Queen's Jubilee Celebrations
LONDON - England - The Queen's Diamond Jubilee celebrations commemorating 60 years of her reign will be celebrated all over Britain and viewed by millions across the world. ... Full story
When There's No More Room in Hell the Dead Shall Walk the Earth
TAMPA - USA - You could be mistaken to think you have awoken inside a George A. Romero film and the zombies are ambling around the streets eating people's faces off all over America. ... Full story