dailouk
Supreme Unelected Comrade Brown to Star in Mr. Bean Film
LONDON - England - Comrade Brown, the unelected leader of the Labour one-party system in the Westminster duma, is throwing down the gauntlet to play the role of the bumbling fool and idiot Mr. Bean in a new feature film production funded by Northern Rock and other unnamed sources. ... Full story
Paris Hilton: Shanghai Delight
SHANGHAI - China - The Paris Hilton circus was in town this week for some great photo ops and shopping sprees. ... Full story
Where to Find the Most Toxic Toys This Christmas
CHICAGO - IL - Looking for the ultimate high this Christmas? Don't worry folks, the Daily Squib has come to the rescue once again for an in depth guide on the best toy junkie highs this holiday season. ... Full story
Disks Containing 25 Million Personal Records Found
LONDON - England - The disks containing the valuable information of 25 million child-benefit recipients was found today in a London High Street. ... Full story
Britney Lost Virginity Late at 14
KENTWOOD - Louisiana - Britney Spears has been hit by allegations that she lost her virginity at the late age of 14. It is not customary for trailer trash in Louisiana to lose their virginity at such a late age. ... Full story
Prince to Sue Own Shadow for Copyright Infringement
Minnie-me-apolis - MN - The artist formerly known as TAFKAP or Prince has ordered his attorneys to sue his own shadow for copyright infringement and for unlawfully impersonating the artist without paying royalties. ... Full story
Comrade Brown to Increase Fuel Tax Again
LONDON - England - After increasing fuel duty by 2p in October, supreme unelected comrade, Gordon Brown, is awarding proles another 2p increase in fuel tax as an early festive gift before state holidays in December. ... Full story
Great Britain to be Renamed Tesco Island
Tescondon - Isle of Tesco - The former British Isles and numerous cities, towns and counties have all been renamed to reflect the diversity of the United Kingdom of Tesco. ... Full story
Britney's Photoshoppers go on Strike
LOS ANGELES - CA - The photoshop retouching artists who have been employed by pop star Britney Spears since the beginning of her career have gone on strike indefinitely, their union official said today. ... Full story
Monopoly Game Money Beats Weak US Dollar
WASHINGTON DC - The worldwide standard currency, the US Dollar, is now weaker than Monopoly money according to monetary analysts. ... Full story
Heather Mills Grows Third Leg
LOS ANGELES - CA - Heather Mills McCartney has grown an additional leg in an astonishing discovery today at a Strictly Come Dancing filming session. ... Full story
Comrade Brown Provides New Homes for Proles
KENT - England - Our Supreme unelected Commander in Chief, Comrade Gordon Brown, has today announced the building of new homes for prole workers on previously protected plush Green Belt countryside land. ... Full story
Christmas Comes Early in Iraq This Year
RAMADI - Iraq - Santa Claus delivered some early Christmas presents to some Iraqi children yesterday. ... Full story